inner thoughts of a music teacher

Alright, well today was interesting...

I had my first visitation day for school, which basically means that the arts coordinator set up a half day where I spend time watching another music teacher in the district. I observed a teacher who taught at my school 3 years ago for one year. Apparently she didn't care for Falk and I was looking forward to meeting her, thinking that we might line up more as far as teaching philosophy. Well...I would say that it was nice to talk to someone who understands Falk. We talked about how the atmosphere is more negative there. It was nice to sort out how I feel with her that way. I like my students, feel like I've developed a good relationship with them, but it is hard to teach at Falk because the general staff there allows disrespect to happen. No one expects students to take responsibility for their actions, and own their behavior. "You have to understand where they are coming from and what their home life is like" - This is what I hear a lot. I don't see how I can settle for less than appropriate behavior, and have high expectations as far as this goes. I love my students, want to advocate for them, and also want them to know that they should be more respectful and responsible so that they can feel success. I heard a student saying something to an after school staff person along the lines of, "well, my parents will whoop me if I disrespect them, but you can't because you're a teacher!" Why is this okay? I just think that we should provide a positive environment, where they are intrinsically motivated to make good choices. The consequences for poor behavior at Falk are pathetic and have no impact. Someone, principal especially, needs to re-evaluate what is going on here. It makes it harder for a teacher, that is trying to do the right thing, to be consistent and effective. I can send a kid out to the recovery room, but I WANT to deal with conflicts/poor behavior on my own because I don't agree with the way things are done in the recovery room all of the time. It's like a kid throws a fit, waits it out, calms down, writes me a quick and meaningless sorry letter, and everyone moves on. What does that really show the kids??

And to go off on what else is on my mind... I was VERY disappointed to meet this teacher today only to find out that she pretty much only teaches stuff from K-8 magazine and MusicExpress. Now, I love both magazines and have gotten a lot of fun songs out of them, mostly for holidays and filler stuff. She is getting ready for a concert, and so I was thinking that was why it seemed like all they did was listen and sing along with a CD while doing some actions. Yes, the kids were engaged and having fun, BUT they weren't really learning anything. I think a lot of music teachers think that as long as they are engaged and loving music and singing that is enough. I don't think they realize the wealth of educational and historic songs that can teach elements of music, as well as be fun for kids. I learned this to the tenth degree last year being in a district that taught mostly using the Kodaly method because it is based on folk songs. Ok, when in theory I thought it was ridiculous that Dr. Cunningham thought we would know all of these old folk songs, and now I realize the value in those songs. I like how they have a historical purpose(ie. work songs), age appropriate melodies, and you can extend them with games. I don't use only older folk songs though. I also like finding new songs, about things in our current students lives, that are still fun but have that educational value. This music teacher today was saying that she hopes she teaches them "perhaps something about music and notes, but just to create music lovers and consumers is the goal". I think you can DO BOTH easily! Well, I shouldn't say easily, but if you do the work it is much more rewarding and effective. It is also not that hard to branch out to find more educational materials. I just think of my elementary music experience, straight out of the text book, and I don't really remember anything we did. I remember a small handful of songs, and absolutely nothing about reading music, and I wouldn't say it made me some kind of music lover. I also attribute that kind of half-ass early music education that I had to the fact that I was a timid and uncomfortable singer for many years, probably up until I student taught and had to do it all the time. I saw great music education happening every single day last year and it is disappointing to be away from it. I hate that it seems like all of the music teachers in Madison are like this too. We have two kinds, textbook teachers, and magazine teachers. The only good thing I can really see about these "styles" is that there is a large opportunity to use culturally appropriate songs and history. I would just rather push myself to find ways to do that with the way I am already doing things. I compare all of this to a middle/high school band teacher who only does pop songs or just runs music/teaches by rote. You could also compare it to a driven musician being placed in a ensemble that doesn't have as high of expectations or level of musicianship and doesn't care to improve. Frustrating...

Her classroom management was not impressive. Yes, the kids liked her and weren't killing each other. They were, however, walking around like they owned the place and interrupting her left and right. All I was thinking was "Julie put me with YOU?" Each teacher has their own style of classroom management though, and some are more comfortable this type of atmosphere. I just think you can have tons of fun, connect with students, while keeping things efficient and productive. I should not have to let kids go off on other topics just so they get a chance to share. If it applies and it is a quick story, by all means then share, but we don't need to waste 5 minutes flipping a flip form over to see what is underneath "just to get our curiosity out of the way". No, they don't need to see, move on and get them interested in what you are doing. Duh. This teacher said, "ready?" like a million times a class, and I thought of when Dr. Heidel pointed out that I kept doing that. I realized how annoying it is, and I am glad that I stopped doing it. I am very careful with my language in general and how I articulate directions, etc. and I am thankful that I have come so far in that area in the last couple of years.

Is it bad that I think I am a better music teacher than a lot of the ones in my district, as a second year teacher??? I feel like a student teacher could learn a lot from me already. I can't wait to have one some day. Now, I TOTALLY am not saying that I have everything down, and that my way is the best. I just think that because of my passion for being a great music teacher I work really hard to do a good job. My lesson plans are very thorough and efficient, and they cover ALL elements of music. I like the variety in my plans and think I understand kids interests and abilities so this helps me. I just miss being around other good teachers daily. I am very reflective and always am looking for new materials and ideas, and I just feel like many teachers take the easy way out. Where can I find other teachers that love learning how to make themselves and their students be the best they can be? Can't wait to see what happens next year.

Oh man, that was a long rant, but I knew it would be driving away from that school today.

This weekend was Erin's Bridal Shower and Bachelorette Party. The shower was boring and the party started that way, but later turned out to be an awesome night. It's like, drink drink drink not drunk yet, OOPS WASTED! I am a little embarrassed that Mom and Dad saw me drunk, although Dad was drunk soooo...awesome. I have never seen him drunk, it was awesome. Erin's friends are all young and skinny(lightweights), so not that fun for us. We didn't see many people from high school out so that was also a relief. Pat had fun with the guys, and he was also funny drunk at the end of the night. At the bacc party we all had to take a blank outline of a guy and draw our dream guy on it, and it was funny. MOM'S!!! EW, she drew a hairy guy and we were like, "DAD?" and she was like, "No, it's for Erin I thought!" Whatever, weird. Theresa's was too realistic it was creepy, mine sucked, and Shannon copied the penis on mine which was funny. Basically she had a anime guy with a big dick. Christa's guy had a funny shaped penis that looked like a barbell and Christines had a red pen so she made a guy with a red afro and huge pubes, gross. One of the ladies there drew a guy in some kind of S&M clothes which was awkward. We also played a relay game where you had to try to get a roll of toilet paper that was in between your legs onto someone else's broomstick, also between their legs. Guess you'd have to be there. Stout Ale House service sucked yet again. I think that I am going to write them a letter to complain. We had a large group so gratuity was included, but service was horrible. They forgot things, messed up orders, and one girl had a raw, pink burger. They told another girl she couldn't order a grasshopper because they were busy. Wtf? It was a Saturday night, and the capacity in that place is like 800. There could not have been more than 200 there. She was a bitch too. My nachos sucked. Anyways, it was a fun weekend. It went by way too fast and when we left home Saturday after going out, I started crying hugging Mom. Ha, I was drunk too so that didn't help.

This is a short week. We have conferences on Thursday so no classes. It should be an easy day for me. I just have to get through tomorrow, day of whatever I want, and then Friday. On Friday Bucky Badger is coming with some cheerleaders and a small group of Badger Band people. It should be fun, but I am just annoyed that all these teachers expect me to teach about the badger band. Excuse, but what is there to teach. I'll spend 10 minutes on it, but not weeks. Give me a break. I have so many other things to focus on, like a concert.

I am feeling better, as far as health, this week. I still have gunk up in hur. At times I will have an annoying and suffocating coughing fit, and feel a little stuffed up in the morning, but I am fine most of the time. That's a relief. Now, we just need to start working out way more often. We have slacked hard core, and the scale is starting to show it. geh, I like working out when I am there, and it always feels great afterwords, but dragging myself there is the problem. We only have a month until Pat and Erin's wedding so hopefully we can still make some progress. I tried my dress on this weekend and it fits really well, but it'd be nice to lose just a little bit, and go tanning too.

Ok, long post. If you made it to the end, good for you! You are a true friend, ha. Oh I like how last time the only comments I got were from Becky and Theresa. Cmon people, leave me a laugh!

Have a great night!